my world

I think this is my favorite picture so far...the smile on his face, and the sweet light blue...regardless of the tubes, I love it!

Jonah has been off oxygen for more than 48 hours now...although after he eats from the bottle he has a hard time keeping up his sats, just from working so hard to eat. He really needs to conserve his energy so he can work hard on eating and staying off oxygen. I have actually had him in his crib a little more because he seems to oxygenate better when he is in there after a feeding. I think being more upright, and not crumpled in someones arms works better. Yesterday he seemed to be having a bit of a tummy ache...he would get this big frown on his face, and act like he was going to cry but he rarely did...just seemed uncomfortable. They did switch to the gentle "ease" formula to see if that would help his little tummy, and his tendency to "spit". I think it is because he is not very good at burping, so he gets air pockets and then his food just comes up.

Over all...we are getting better at eating. A couple days ago, we had to work hard to get 10-15 cc in him, and now most times he will take 20-30 per feeding. That is still only around 1 ounce...so we have a ways to go. I am thinking we will be in this same boat till the begining of next week, but hoping for sooner!

Last night, we left the hospital, and I was just feeling very depleted. I know it is normal for new moms to be very tired, and I am thankful for the full nights of sleep (one of the only good things about all this), but there is a hole in my heart and an empty bed in my home. It is getting hard to be patient for this little guy to mature enough to eat on his own. His neighbor that weighs just under 5 pounds gets to go home tomorrow. I am very happy for them, but can't help but to feel a little jealous. I just wish it was our turn soon. I can't wait to start our new life (outside of the hospital) as a family.